


Share a Coke (With Your Soulmate)

by karebear94



Category: Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Coca-Cola, Domestic Avengers, F/M, M/M, News Media, Parody, Pepsi, Soulmate AU, coke v pepsi, hydra conspiracies, inspired by Share A Coke advertisements, new coke, non-traditional narrative, sorta kinda i guess, steve likes mexican coke which is the stuff with sugar instead of high fructose corn syrup, the concept for this fic is absurd
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-02
Updated: 2015-08-02
Packaged: 2018-04-12 13:25:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4480925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/karebear94/pseuds/karebear94
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Getting two people to Share a Coke takes more effort than one would think.<br/>or<br/>Natasha and Wanda are meddlers (with the help of Vision) and Sam is a suffering Pepsi-drinker. Steve and Bucky are, of course, oblivious.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Share a Coke (With Your Soulmate)

**Author's Note:**

> Really it's a shame that other than insignificant trace amounts, cocaine was taken out of Coca-Cola in 1903. Otherwise this would have LITERALLY been a crack fic. It was entirely taken out by '28, if i'm remembering correctly.
> 
> this is pretty much un-beta'd

“Have you checked the news yet this week?” Natasha asks as she sips from the coffee mug that Steve had poured for himself. She somehow had taken it out of his hands without him even realizing that she was in the room.

He thinks she does this on purpose to make him less jumpy whenever someone sneaks up on him. He admits to himself that it has been working.

“Is there something about Bucky?” Steve asks when his mind catches up to her question. He asked Sam to keep track of the news for any mentions of his friend- he found the typical coverage too depressing and not very enlightening- but if Natasha noticed something Sam hadn’t…

“No, nothing like that. Just that the everyday world is getting weirder and weirder. I count it as my duty to not let you get farther behind in pop culture. Check this out.” She slid over a Starkpad with a News article open.

_**CEO of Coke Announces New Coca-Cola Drinks That Help You Find Your Soulmate** _

_In a press release made today, the of Coca-Cola has announced that their team of researchers has found a way to determine if who you are Sharing a Coke with is indeed your true soulmate, as one version of the Share a Coke ad campaign suggests._

_“We are very excited to share this new product with the public. It has done very well with focus groups and we can’t wait to help everyone find their soulmates. The products with the ability will be specially marked, but we hope that eventually, Sharing a Coke will eventually become second nature when developing romantic relationships.” A representative for the company said._

_More about the product will be revealed as the product is set to hit shelves early next year._

“Soulmates? Really?”

“Told you it was weird. I just thought you ought to know. As a forewarning.” Natasha turned to leave with the StarkPad and Steve’s Super-soldier sized coffee mug.

“But don’t worry. It’s not anything I’m going to make you deal with.” She said as she left the kitchen area. Steve got himself some more coffee and shook his head, thoughts drifting back to the time when Coke actually tasted good. He should ask Sam where he can get more Mexican Coke.

He never considered that in that moment, Natasha might have lied to him.

* * *

“And F.R.I.D.A.Y. is able to soundproof rooms, so don’t be worried about if you have nightmares, and no matter what time, feel free to have F.R.I.D.A.Y. wake me up, I mean it. I’ll get you whatever you want, promise. Also-”

“Steve.” Bucky cut him off.

Steve stopped mid sentence, mouth still open.

“It’s all right. You don’t have to convince me to get me to stay.”

“And… you’ll tell me if you ever want to leave, right?”

“I promise, Steve.” Bucky said softly.

* * *

“Wanda, is this what you were referring to the other day?” Vision said as he handed her a glossy magazine. A quick look at the cover revealed that it was one of the many trashy magazines that Maria especially liked to laugh at. Wanda flipped open to the article Vision was asking her about.

_**It’s Finally Here! Coke’s New Find Your Soulmate Drinks Hit Shelves This Week, Just In Time For Valentines Day!** _

_For all of you out there wondering if the one you’re with really is The One, you might want to try one of these drinks. The projected sales for this product is high, but for those of you who are worried they might not get one of the coveted drinks before they fly off the shelf, we have some good news! In a statement last Friday, a representative said:_

_“For now we are marketing this as a seasonal item, but if there are enough sales, we might just make it permanent.”_

_The release of this statement is probably due to concerns over the possibility of people hording the drink if it is seasonal and selling individual bottles at later times. And don’t worry about cheating on your diet for one of these: there’s a diet version!_

“Yes. Do you want to see if their magic is a good as mine?” Wanda asked with a glint in her eye.

* * *

“OH MY GOD!”

Three Avengers came running to find Tony covering his eyes dramatically.

“Tony, what’s wrong?”

“No PDA’s should be allowed. ESPECIALLY IN AREAS ANYONE CAN WALK INTO AND WHEN ONE PERSON IS TECHNICALLY MY GRANDCHILD.”

“THE GREAT TONY STARK HAS NO PLACE TO JUDGE.” a distinctly Sokovian voice replied.

“Wait, since when has that been a thing?” Bucky asked. Natasha just patted him on the shoulder.

The door opened to reveal a slightly pink Wanda and a red Vision. However, Vision was always red, so there was no way the group was able to gage his feelings about being caught.

“The Soulmate Coke works.” Vision reported, straight faced.

“Nope. I’m not dealing with this.” Tony said, leaving.

“I’m drinking Pepsi from now on.” Sam copied Tony’s lead, turning on his heel and getting out of there. Natasha suspected that he was internally groaning as well.

“CAPTAIN AMERICA WOULD BE DISAPPOINTED IN YOU FOR NOT DRINKING AN ICONIC AMERICAN DRINK!” Natasha called after him.

“Steve only drinks the stuff with sugar.” Bucky said.

“I’m pretty sure there is a Mexican version of the soulmate formula, too.” Nat elbowed Bucky. "What's your favorite Iconic American Drink, anyway?" Natasha asked.

“I liked New Coke, actually. I'm disappointed it wasn't allowed to continue.”

Vision searched the internet for information about New Coke while Wanda and Natasha stared at him.

"New Coke? Really?" Natasha asked.

“What!? Hydra’s the one that got it to fail at its release!” Bucky defended. 

“I haven’t seen that in any of the Hydra intel.” Natasha said skeptically.

“My therapist says that you’re not allowed to contradict things I know are true. It could make me lose my grounding in reality.” Bucky pouted, knowing that he was working with a tough audience. 

Natasha raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms “Is this a suspicion or knowledge?”

“.... Ok so the memories are a little fuzzy, but I’m not the only one who thinks it!”

“Who the hell are you talking to online, Barnes?”

“I would believe it of them.” Wanda imputed, shrugging her shoulders

“Thanks, Wanda.”

Natasha grins, an idea popping into her head.

“How about this: if you can get proof that Hydra was involved in a conspiracy to cause New Coke to fail then I will get you the New Coke recipe.”

“Deal.” Bucky said immediately.

* * *

“I’m glad I made the switch to Pepsi.” Sam said.

“People who drink Pepsi don’t get soulmates, though, Sam!” Natasha said with sarcastic horror.

“Yeah, but people who drink the regular stuff don’t get it either. I’m just playing it safe, and considering that now we know Hydra had ties in Coca-Cola until the fall of SHIELD, I’m extra glad that I made the switch.”

“You have a point. I still own Barnes the recipe for New Coke, now, though. Rumor has it that it’s in a similar vault to the Classic Coke recipe, because it has too many similarities. The vault will be easy to crack, I just have to find where the recipe is hidden.”

"Why'd you make this deal in the first place?"

"A girl has her reasons."

* * *

“Can your ants tell the difference between the Soulmate Coke and the Classic Coke?”

“I don’t know, I just tell them to avoid it. And I’m not willing to put my ants in danger for the sake of a test, so don’t ask me too.”

* * *

_**Soulmate Coke Factory in Explosive Accident** _

_Coca-Cola Factory Explosion Leaves Questions To Whether Soulmate Coke is Safe._

_Investigations Are Made Into Coke’s Claim That Terrorists Were Responsible For Factory Explosion._

* * *

“I thought you said that Coke ‘used to’ be tied to Hydra, not ‘Still is!’” Natasha said, exasperated.

“Shit, are they poisoning the Coke?!” Bucky was immediatly concerned

“No, they were just getting back into position in the company. They weren’t strong enough in the ranks to pull of contamination of the drinks, Thank God. And I was able to take care of the person in charge of letting Hydra into their ranks. There shouldn’t be any problems with them.”

“Thank God. Steve would hate to give up on Coke. He’s really playing up on his disapproval of Pepsi to Sam. It’s hilarious.” Bucky said with a stupid grin on his face.

If there was a camera around, Natasha would look at it as if she were on the office.  

* * *

_**RECALL ON COKE PRODUCTS POTENTIALLY CONTAMINATED WITH SOULMATE COKE** _

_There was much rejoicing when it was announced that Soulmate Coke would be sticking around for another month ‘trial period’ after it’s initial Valentines success. However, there are some that opposed the idea of finding their Soulmate in an ‘unauthentic’ manner. That’s why it’s important to know that some cans of the regular Coke Classic may be contaminated. You might just accidently find your soulmate. Now wouldn’t that be a story to tell the grandkids?_

* * *

“So you think you can reproduce the effects?” Natasha asked.

“Oh, definitely.” Wanda said. “Now that we know which additions were made to balance the taste with the contaminated samples, Vihz can add the ingredients and I can cast a spell to make the container react to the bond like the cans or bottles normally do. It’s easy.”

“So could you do it on New Coke if you had the recipe?”

* * *

“I don’t care if you claim it’s better, Bucky. I like my coke with real sugar in it. Do you know what they are saying about high fructose corn syrup?”

“You’re a super soldier, Steve! And that Coke could be contaminated. There was a recall on the Mexican stuff, too, you know.”

“Which is why no one’s sharing a drink with me, Bucky. It only can do it if you share one, Bucky.”

Bucky harrumphed.

“You just want to steal my drink, don’t you.” Steve said, eyes thinning in suspicion.

“We always used to share back in the 40s, Stevie.” Bucky said sadly, leaving the room to mope.

Steve’s mood immediately dropped and he looked at the glass bottle of the Mexican Coke in his hand.

He sighed, before putting the closed bottle of soda back in the fridge. He was no longer in the mood to drink it.

* * *

“Barnes offered like we suspected once he found out the Mexican Coke was recalled as well, but Steve didn’t rise up to the bait.” Wanda reported.

“Damn. Well, we’ll just have to go to more desperate measures.” Natasha replied.

“I don’t condone this” Sam said from where he was sitting drinking his Pepsi.

“Shush, Sam, and stop drinking that crap, you’ll lose your ability to love.” Wanda said.

Sam wanted to scream that sexual and romantic orientation was not determined by soda drinking. Instead he settles for having it be his turn to look at the camera like he’s in the office.  

* * *

“Hey, Steve, have you ever noticed how protective Bucky gets of his soda?” Natasha asked.

“No, I hadn’t. Is he?” Steve asked, brow furrowing. Natasha internally smiled. Perfect step 1, getting Steve to think he doesn’t know something about Bucky that someone else has noticed.

“Yeah, like the other day I thought he was done with it, and I was gonna take it to the sink, but he shouting ‘No!’ at me when I tried to pick it up.”

“He’s never done anything like that around me…” Steve said.

“Hu. Maybe he’s just more comfortable around you.” Step 2, affirm that Steve is still Bucky’s best friend, but let him be curious about the habit.

“Maybe.” Steve said, but Natasha could see his mind working.

* * *

Avengers movie night was a big affair, and each person had their respective sodas as they settled around the television.

But Steve was just not able to concentrate, thinking about what Natasha said. Was it true that Bucky only let him touch his drink? And then the other day, when Bucky mentioned them sharing their drinks when they were young. Was this really such a big deal to Bucky? He looked at his best friend, sitting next to him, and felt a pull in his heart. If Bucky really cared so much, then he would readily give up Mexican Coke and drink New Coke for the rest of his life.

He looked down at Bucky’s half- drunken soda and made a decision. He picked up the soda, and Bucky didn’t even seem to notice. That is, until Steve put the drink to his lips, and a blinding flash of light lit up the room, causing all the other avengers to look over at him and Bucky.

Written on the side the bottle that Bucky had kept on reusing was the word “Soulmate” glowing slightly in bright white.

He looked at Bucky, who was staring right back at him. Both of their eyes were wide in shock.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Steve asked.

“Why didn’t YOU tell ME?” Bucky asked back.

“Wait, isn’t that Buckster’s soda? How did that get Soulmate stuff in it?” Tony asked.

Vision, Wanda, and Natasha all high-fived.

"I would like to go on the record saying that I had nothing to do with this." Sam said.

"Stevie." Bucky said. 

"Yeah, Buck?"

"Let's go talk about this. Somewhere where we don't have an audience." He said, laying a hand on Steve's thigh.

"Oka- Ohhhhhhh. Yeah." Steve coughed, turning pink.

"Oh, no, please stay. This is great, don't let us bother you." Tony said with glee. He turned to the conspirators.

"Why didn't you do this earlier, Steve is hilarious when he's being flirted with."

"Let's go, Bucky." Steve said, pulling Bucky up off the couch by the hand and dragging him away.

"USE PROTECTION!" Tony and Natasha called out in unison.

From then on, Steve and Bucky alternated drinking New Coke and Mexican Coke, always choosing to share.

 

They made it work.


End file.
